leujin: (Dr. Girlfriend (wtf?))
[personal profile] leujin
Have you ever watched a movie and then wished you could take those 2 hours of your life back?

That's how I feel after watching "Knowing."

It's Nic Cage, so I knew it wasn't going to be mind-blowing, but I didn't expect it to be so abysmal. And in truth, it really WASN'T that bad up until the last 20 minutes. That's when it took a turn from "Yeah, this is alright, I guess," into "WHAT IN THE NAME OF HELL WERE THEY THINKING? GOD, THIS IS STUPID."

It starts in 1959, where we meet a young girl, Luscinda, who is apparently insane. She spends her time staring at the sun and is a social parriah. She's called into class by her teacher, as recess is over, and we cross-fade into the classroom. There the teacher announces that the project to celebrate their new school has been decided, and surprise of surprises, it was Luscinda's idea! They build a time capsule and everyone draws a picture. Except Luscinda, who furiously scrawls a series of meaningless (or so it would seem!) numbers. Her teacher is frustrated, and for some reason decides that it's okay to put them in the time capsule. I guess because otherwise there would be no movie and it would just end with everyone dying.

Fast forward to 2009 where we meet Nicolas Cage, college professor! As is par for the course, he spends most of the time looking intense and alternating between mumbling and shouting. We find out he has a son, Caleb, and a dead wife. Wouldn't you know it, the son attends the same elementary school we were introduced to in the prologue, and it's the 50th anniversary of the time capsule, which means it's time to open it! Each student gets to open one of the drawings, and as you've probably already guessed, Caleb gets the mysterious numbers. He accidentally takes them home, Nic gets intense, then gets drunk, and then starts decoding the numbers. He figures out that the numbers predicted the date and location (Lat/Long) of all of the disasters over the last 50 years. Except the last three, which are dates in the future! We also find out that the disaster which killed his wife was on the list, and he laments about if he had gotten this list earlier, he could've saved his wife.

The rest of the movie follows Nic as he tries to convince his friends and family and anybody who will listen to him shout about the calamities that could be avoided. Shockingly, nobody listens to him. The antagonists are these creepy, silent, suit wearing chaps who look surprisingly Sweedish. They communicate to Caleb and the granddaughter of Luscinda, who Nic meets after tracking down the daughter, by whispering in their heads (telepathy, basically). There's a twist ending involving them, which I'm sure you'll be able to figure out pretty quickly. Once we get to the point where we find out the last numbers on the list, followed by "EE," in fact predict the end of the world, the movie gets outright moronic. It turns out the sun is getting ready to spew out a "mega flare," whose radiation is going to erradicate the Earth's atmosphere.

Like I said before, the movie isn't terrible for the most part. I've gotten to the point where I can still enjoy the occassional Nic Cage movie (I enjoyed National Treasure and Ghost Rider wasn't all THAT bad. In fact, compared to this movie it was Oscar material) even though he's been in some bad BAD movies. There's enough action to keep it from stagnating, and there are only a handful of head-slappingly "duh" moments. It turns out that the erstwhile antagonists were in fact aliens sent to save "the chosen" (those that can hear the whispers). I'm sure nobody saw that coming. What really drags the movie down is the fact that this ending is stupidly predictable and they spend WAY too much forcing us to emote as Nic has to watch his son leave as the world explodes. The movie literally spends 10 minutes on having Caleb and the girl get on the space ship and a handful of other spaceships leaving Earth.

To summarize, don't watch this movie. You would have a better time getting a root canal.
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July 2011


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