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I'm worried about my mother and my sister.
At the same time, I'm tired of them putting me in the middle of it.
To preface, my sister is 13, so she and my mother are having all the regular problems that people in this situation find themselves in. However, this is compounded by the fact that my mother isn't letting herself be sad about Adrian dying, and she's never around when my sister needs her. Instead of dealing with the problem at hand, my mom chooses to instead ignore my sister. When she's not ignoring her, she's putting my sister on a pedastal and holding her up to these impossible standards and "why can't you be more like your brother?" She wants a best friend, which is what she had in Adrian--a wholy unusual relationship in and of itself--but what Chloe needs is a mother.
Chloe is acting out. She's apparently been stealing the car (or helping her friends steal it, I'm not clear because my mother isn't clear) and my mom found a used condom in the toilet, but rather than saying something about it, she chooses to ignore it. I don't know what kind of lazy ass parenting that is, but I certainly don't condone either sides of this. My sister needs to straighten up and fly right and my mom needs to be there to enforce this.
Another part of the problem is that my mom has a boyfriend. I'm not saying this is a bad thing, but the fact that she has to have two jobs AND has a 13-year-old daughter at home means she doesn't really have time for that. Apparently she's down to only seeing him twice a night, but rather than going OUT with him she needs to stay IN with him.
This is just stressing me out, because I don't want to choose sides here, but they're basically forcing me to by pulling me into it, and I'm honestly skewing in favor of my sister. Not because I approve of her actions, but because she's so clearly crying out for attention and not getting it because my mom is too involved in her own shit to notice there's a problem. I've tried explaining to my mom that she needs to be around more and I've tried explaining to Chloe that she needs to cut Mom some slack, but both of them just say "Yeah, I guess..." and do nothing about it. They're both frustratingly passive-aggressive. When my mom found out that Liz and I were having sex pre-maritally do you know what she did? Waited until I went to college before sending me a lengthy e-mail expressing her disappointment. That doesn't discourage me, it just makes me think she doesn't care enough to enforce the rules!
Bah.
At the same time, I'm tired of them putting me in the middle of it.
To preface, my sister is 13, so she and my mother are having all the regular problems that people in this situation find themselves in. However, this is compounded by the fact that my mother isn't letting herself be sad about Adrian dying, and she's never around when my sister needs her. Instead of dealing with the problem at hand, my mom chooses to instead ignore my sister. When she's not ignoring her, she's putting my sister on a pedastal and holding her up to these impossible standards and "why can't you be more like your brother?" She wants a best friend, which is what she had in Adrian--a wholy unusual relationship in and of itself--but what Chloe needs is a mother.
Chloe is acting out. She's apparently been stealing the car (or helping her friends steal it, I'm not clear because my mother isn't clear) and my mom found a used condom in the toilet, but rather than saying something about it, she chooses to ignore it. I don't know what kind of lazy ass parenting that is, but I certainly don't condone either sides of this. My sister needs to straighten up and fly right and my mom needs to be there to enforce this.
Another part of the problem is that my mom has a boyfriend. I'm not saying this is a bad thing, but the fact that she has to have two jobs AND has a 13-year-old daughter at home means she doesn't really have time for that. Apparently she's down to only seeing him twice a night, but rather than going OUT with him she needs to stay IN with him.
This is just stressing me out, because I don't want to choose sides here, but they're basically forcing me to by pulling me into it, and I'm honestly skewing in favor of my sister. Not because I approve of her actions, but because she's so clearly crying out for attention and not getting it because my mom is too involved in her own shit to notice there's a problem. I've tried explaining to my mom that she needs to be around more and I've tried explaining to Chloe that she needs to cut Mom some slack, but both of them just say "Yeah, I guess..." and do nothing about it. They're both frustratingly passive-aggressive. When my mom found out that Liz and I were having sex pre-maritally do you know what she did? Waited until I went to college before sending me a lengthy e-mail expressing her disappointment. That doesn't discourage me, it just makes me think she doesn't care enough to enforce the rules!
Bah.
